Thursday Night

So it dawns on me as I am sitting at my local pub that's there are a lot of people here. Now I should probably preface this to say that it seems as if it has been a week since I have showered and left the house, so perhaps the activity is just a bit startling - like light in the eyes after darkness - but it feels good.  What secrets have been happening while I have I been tapping away at those keys? All these people out and about on a work night, and they ain't young! (eyebrow raise)

I was given a book by a friend that I cracked open tonight and within 20 minutes of reading I am convinced I must buy 20 copies and mail each, wrapped in brown paper, to key colleagues, a couple friends, and my Mom.  A serendipitous delivery from a dear friend.

The contentment I am feeling is in part sourced by the sense that I am finally part of my community ('hey, I've seen that guy before', and 'oh, there is that cute dog') -  and clumsily the entrance into a new position at work combined with utter cluelessness about the future.  In fact, as I walked over to the pub tonight I actually thought about how I have found my equilibrium point - who I am.  In the Chi it was standard for me to leave the house about 9p on a Thursday in hot pursuit of a good meal and good conversation. The objective tonight no different .... though the result is still catching up, I have a sense of this is who I am and who I like to be.  Most likely will sleep until 9AM tomorrow.

Truth is, life is simmering into the sweet syrup of perfection and though I push the urgency for the future and still tears fall for the longing of the past, I know in my soul today is just right.